Saturday, August 30, 2008

its three years since I lost my bro...

My brother who lives within me...I remember his birth, we were at Shantanu's(my childhood friend) place since ma was in the nursing home...baba called up in the wee hours of the morning to tell us that Ranu( my mother) has got a son! He was very clear on the fact that we could go to see the baby only in the evening after school. I was far to excited to attend class with full concentration that day. Before baba could return from office, I was dressed in my finest party frock, a pink lace dress that I guarded like a secret treasure. Baba laughed at my excitement and I was indignant, was it really any less than a party to go to see my new little bro?
He was the most beautiful baby ever, this I say even now. They say a mother finds her own child the most beautiful, when my son was born and I first set my eyes on him, the first thoughts that came to my mind was that he was not as beautiful as my brother. By the end of the evening, my pink lace dress was dripping wet, the baby had chosen to wet my lap all three times that I attempted to carry him! From then on, my biggest delight was to carry my baby brother. Ma had set a stringent rule, no carrying baby unless homework is done. It was hard to believe how this prankster of a girl needed no more motivation and at the end of the term, I stood II in class as opposed to the previous term when I had stood XVII!
Gopal(thats what we called my bro at home) and I grew up with a gaping seven year gap that seemed to widen each day. I was extremely bossy, hated the fact that he slept beside mom, disliked it even more that that I had lost all my importance at home and thus may have in some silly way even shown my favorite emotion- Jealousy. But funnily, when Gopal was im trouble, take for instance, he lost his Chemistry note book one day before submission, and while Gopal happily slept, I burnt the night oil and the note was ready to be submitted on time. His friends used to be petrified of me, for if they fought with Gopal or didnot allow him to bat, and I got wind of it, it would be their worst day...
He didn't attend my marriage, in all probability we may have had a fight just before the ceremony, that was the extent to which we could hate each other...I reached my maternal home on the last month of my pregnancy. Gopal would come back from office everyday with something that I liked to eat. From the day Pablo(my son) was born, Gopal's life kind of changed. He would come home straight from work and spend time with the baby and me. He named my son Abhimanue( with its quaint spelling), a name he had wanted to name his own son. He would tell me later, this is my son, see how proud he will make us...I will realize my dreams through him, he would say again and again.
Gopal came to stay with us when we first came to Mumbai,and I didnot like it much. He was an even more difficult person to handle now and often we would have major quarrels. He went on to live in Mumbai till 2001, when he decided to to take up a job offer in Bangalore. Our visits to Bangalore during his stay there were memorable. On one occasion he took us to Mysore and how we enjoyed ourselves!Our fights were a constant source of delight to my son who always took sides with his mama to irritate me. Gopal decided to move back to mumbai in 2003 with a plush job in LOWE Lintas.he worked in Mumbai only for a year and a half, before cruel fate took him away from us. The last leg of his time with us,we were more close than ever, he would look up to me always, his eyes would say "I am safe when Jolly is around". I was on an assignment to Jordan when the floods happened In Mumbai. Gopal was caught up in the rains. Later he described to me how much he enjoyed holding hands with total strangers and walking home through neck deep waters sometimes. He told me about boys swimming up to them and stuffing wada pav into their mouths since they were all holding hands. This he found to be very endearing. He didnt last too long after the floods. He contracted meningitis. and all of a sudden he was no more. Today it is 3 years since I lost my bro...his childhood pictures flood my mind and tears blur my eyes as I share this blog with u...

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

A postscript to' Friends Indeed'

Guilt at having forgotten two superb friends wouldnt let me rest in peace and so this postscript. Mythili, my friend of 30 odd years. We met at the school where I had just begun my teaching career.She came in to do her B.Ed practice, I was assigned the task to judge her performance. We built an instant rapport,though older to me by 7 years, she neither looked old nor behaved old. Today she is in London, my mentor and guide in all my teaching assignments,when we do meet up its like as if time has stood still. Very protective and caring, would never be able to find a friend like her.
Turni, am imp of a girl, put her into a uniform, she could still pass off as a school going kid is one friend I made on the train whom I hold very close to my heart. Have been pillars of support to each other every time there was the need, She is one girl I can talk to for hours and not get bored. My list of friends is still incomplete, have not written about loads of people who have left their imprint on my life...even though not mentioned, their memories I hold very close to my heart.

Monday, August 4, 2008

Friends indeed!

I woke up to the ring of the message tone of my cell phone...it was not even 4 in the morning and here was Elizabeth, with her lovely message of what Friendship is all about. I smiled sleepily at the thought of my dear Elizabeth,the most loving any friend can ever be. Its sad that inspite of my best efforts, I could never match her fervour for keeping our relationship alive. We had met long ago at VJTI,we were correcting university papers together,she chemistry and me english, but the chemistry between us was volatile. We hit off as great buddies and what it is today is difficult to describe. She has a kind of sixth sense telling her when J needs her and there she is with her concern and care that would be so hard to replicate. Can go on and on writing about her, but I will have to stop and tell u about some other friends who have made a marked difference to my life.
Niru, my dear dear friend from college days, dont think I ever gelled with anyone as I did with her. We started of on a wrong footing,she didnt like people telling her that the two of us resembled,she thought she was a lot prettier( which even I thought she was, and secretly loved being compared with her). Our friendship has lasted years and years inspite of her settling in France. My dream come true was when I visited her in France. In many ways she has been my mentor, she has groomed me to the style that I always shied away from. She would buy clothes for me that I would baulk to wear, but also taught me to feel poised in the very same clothes. Today I get a lot compliments on the way I carry myself...thanks Niru...
Keya, my friend from childhood,I kind of grew up in her shadow, pretty as a picture, when keya was around, boys had no time for us. We were in different schools but met at the community centre and loved each others company,,,they got transfered and moved to Kolkata, I had lost touch with her and got back with her only a year ago after a gap of almost 25 years, and got back how? as if the 25 years didnt exist at all!
Babua, the hero, knew he had a crush on me all along, but did pretty little to precipitate matters,he left for the US, we would get to hear of him on and off, an ideal son who holds his family together at all times, got in touch with 2 years ago, yet to meet and regale old tales, loved him always ina a quaint sort of way...
Tuntuni, my idol since my baby years, she was everything I could never be, feminine, petite. shy, soft spoken, uff...she still has it all! love her a lot. Had a reunion of sorts with her in Delhi this years and it was oh so wonderful...
Preetha, the lovely lass whom I encountered at Vidyalankar. A demure girl, she has evolved over the years, and is a thorough delight to spend time with. A girl with unusual thoughts and lot of latent talent is my very good friend to date. Amit from the same office was another good friend I made then, who is still one of my best friends and is truly concerned for me. The way he has matured over the years is amazing to believe.
The most amazing friend I made was Popai, we had this instant chemistry, biology and physics all together, we almost fell in love, but the relationship didnt go beyond a few loving letters to one another till we lost touch competely and got in touch once again a couple of yaers ago. Much water has flown under the bridge since then, the chemistry has washed down a lot, but I think we still care for each other a lot in an indescribable way...
Shivraj, my boss at THC, but more friend than a boss. We had so much fun together during my tenure with the office, and till today he remembers to call on me everytime he needs to word a letter or mail! The bonus of meeting him is that u get to eat the best food in town, a thorough foodie, loves to throw impromptu parties and i love him all the more for it.
very recently I got a lil net savvy, and have been making a lot of friends on the net. Atul was my first net friend in the real sense, a delightful conversationalist with abundant humor and wisdom in equal proportions, and above all a great father to his little son Nanha. He has been my mentor at good parenting and often gives me very valuable tips on management studies that I really really need...
Orkut gave me lovely friends, Pratim whom I lost just three days after we got to know each other, and through him a host of lovely friends, Poo who is a delightful girl and truly cares for me, we have super chats on the gtalk, met up with her briefly in Delhi through sheer coincidence and though the meeting was brief, it has left me with a lot of memories. Shyamolima, the tall, beautiful very introverted girl, whom I met up with again on my trip to Delhi. When she came into the Kali bari guest house to meet me, it wasnt like we were meeting each other for the first time, it was like we knew each other for ages!I wish her the very best in her life's endevours.DJ, my closest pal on the net, he has the capacity to hurt me the most because my expectations from him far excede what he is actually capable of. So we have these mad fights and cold wars, and then get back to each other like house on fire.
Have made a lot of other friends on the net worth treasuring, Devil, Mithun, Megh, Raj and a host of others whom I look forward to meeting someday. (Devil, I have met already at Delhi, but I guess we need to know each other a lot more). Parasmoni, whom I met through our blogspot is another facinating character, writes the most touching poems in a very contemporary style and appears really bindaas and carefree on chats, still to figure out the real Paras.
In the process of recalling friends, I may have missed out on some friends who have made a mark somewhere in my life, not that I love them less, but that I cant go on and on and on. This blog I began writing as a tribute to friendship on Friendship Day!With the burden of enormous assignments, both professional and personal, it had taken a back seat.Now in Chennai, in a relaxed atmosphere I hope to have done justice to people who came in to my life, and life was never the same...