Monday, June 2, 2008

Life moves on...

Pratim's birthday yesterday brought in fresh thoughts of grief...his untimely death was major blow to my emotions,a vibrant enegetic life brought to a standstill by this omnious unchanging reality of life. I recall my friendship with him on the net that lasted precisely 3 days. A very interesting conversationalist, I looked forward to chatting with him. I was new to my job those days, didnt really know if we were allowed to go into chat channels during working hours and so restricted myself to small chats. It was a friday when I last scraped to him and was looking forward to a weekend masti which alas never came! By monday my worst fears were comfirmed, Pratim was no more...the frantic search for and his whereabouts landed me with new friends, new relationships, heartbreaks, short a new bag of emotions. It is really amazing how life really is our greatest teacher.
More recently, I lost a dear student, just graduated from our portals and new into his job, when life held only promises for him, his death on the railtracks was a gruesome reminder of the promiscuousness of life, that plays games with us at all times. I regret that on our last meeting during the convocation, Roshan, the student in discussion, was very keen to click a pic with me. I am most enthusiastic about pics, dont know why, get a childlike glee in posing for photos, but on that particular day, I had no time at all, loads of work, and so had to decline Roshan's offer for another time...time that will never come again. His smiling face surfaces on my minds eye ever so many times...Life can be really cruel.
This year has been one of emotional upheavals, coping with them is a herculean task. My sound professional life is the only thing that holds me together when both family and friends whom I have depended on have let me down. Everytime I dress up to go to work, I think to myself. life just goes on, I smile at my reflection in the mirror which looks like a stranger to me sometimes because of the incongruity of the emotions and the image it portrays, and move on...on this path called life.